Depression Stage Of The Grief Process

“The Depression Stage” is the third of the Five Stages of Grief that were created by Elisabeth Kubler Ross & David Kessler. Basically, this stage involves a deep acknowledgment of the loss and a profound sadness because of it.

However, the depression stage can manifest itself in several ways. So, let’s go over what might happen when you enter into the “depression” stage.

Why Anger & Bargaining Turns to Depression

If you noticed the progression of the stages thus far, you’re beginning at a stage of complete denial and eventually leading yourself toward feeling your genuine emotions. So, you go from being angry about the loss to begging for a little more time.

Once you realize that no amount of begging will bring your loved one or relationship back, you begin to feel the sadness of knowing things won’t be the way they once were. That’s where depression rears its ugly head.

In this stage, you’ve come to terms with the fact that these changes or losses are really occurring and that there’s absolutely nothing that you can do about it. In actuality, all you can do is cope with your emotions.

What to Expect

You’ll probably spend a lot of time wondering what’s the point of even continuing on with your life after this loss. After all, a major part of your life was basically stolen from you and you don’t know if you’ll ever fully recover.

Here’s what you might experience when you’re in the depression stage.

Inability to sleep despite feeling extremely tired or fatigued
Appetite changes, whether you’re eating to cope or just avoiding food altogether
Lack of control of your emotions, including crying and anger
A sense of loneliness
A lingering sense of anxiety

Though we can’t put a timeline on each stage of grief, the depression stage does tend to last the longest. At the same time, it’s practically the last stage of grief, as the next stage would be acceptance and returning to your everyday life.

When the Depression Stage Becomes Actual Depression

Even though the depression stage is a completely normal stage of grief, there’s a point at which it becomes something more severe. We’re talking about when depression from grief becomes an actual mental health condition.

So, how do you know whether your depression stage is actually depression? Well, the depression tends to stick around a little longer than it normally would.

While those around you are slowly moving on with their lives and returning to normal, you’re still engulfed in the sadness and unable to function as normal.

There are also some other effects that might become a little more severe, including….

Suicidal thoughts or just thinking about ending it all
Sleeping much longer than usual and have a hard time getting out of bed
Developing regret or guilt for things you did or didn’t do
Lack of enjoyment of activities or hobbies you once loved
Slacking on hygiene like showering, shaving, or cleaning the house

When you notice that your grief is lasting a little too long and that you’re in a downward spiral, it’s important that you reach out for help and find professional health.

Final Thoughts

The depression stage is the last intense phase of the grieving process, but it begs to be felt. But, it also tends to be the longest stage of grief, so don’t be surprised if you have a low mood and intense sadness for a prolonged period of time.

The best thing you can do is to keep an eye on the depression stage and get professional help if it seems to be turning into actual depression.

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